In April I miscarried, and it was at that moment that I realized that I really WANTED to be pregnant. For the most part, the fear of the unknown left my mind.
In June I was pregnant again. Since I was considered a "high risk" pregnancy, I was given ultrasounds every few weeks. So, where most women are only lucky enough to get two or three pictures, I have about twelve...at least there's one benefit to having a seizure disorder!!
I don't remember much of the pregnancy, since my seizure disorder has really screwed around with my memory over the years. I know that I LOVED my maternity clothes though! It was difficult to recall certain events, and unfortunately my pregnancy was one of those events.
The Epidural was next. I was happy to have someone do this who'd been doing it for 20 years. I thought this would be a lucky break for me since I'd heard that getting the epidural was quite painful. It was!! This lady had to stick me THREE times to get the needle in the right place. She later told me that in 20 years, I was her hardest stick. I'm so honored!
26 hours after entering the hospital, Brandon Nicholls Toale was born via C-section, weighing 7lbs, 11oz, and 19 inches long. He was COMPLETELY healthy, with no signs of developmental problems at all. Where a lot of women would rather give birth vaginally, I was very grateful to have had a C-section. My body wouldn't have been able to handle pushing a baby and it probably would've thrown me into a ton of seizures. Plus, I had the coolest man administering the local anesthetic. He asked me what kind of music I wanted to hear, so they blasted the Beatles!!
Daddy with his new little man!
Grandma with her new favorite grandson!!
Our little, perfect baby
I discovered that when there's something very important to take care of, your body heals quickly! My recovery was swift, which surprised everyone. There was a silent fear that my seizure disorder wouldn't allow me to take care of Brandon the way a mother should: I stunned everyone again with how attentive I was.
Brandon will be four next March and continues to simply thrive. He is mentally and physically perfect, showing no side effects from the medication that I was on. He simply is a miracle baby.
Ooo Daddy, whatever you're saying I'm lovin' it!
Look at that smile!
Who doesn't love their bath time?
Mowing the lawn with Grandma
People have asked me if I want to have more children. I would love to have more children, but it simply isn't healthy for me or another unborn child. I'm healthier now than I've ever been and I truly believe that we were blessed to have received this sweet, healthy spirit. Tempting fate wouldn't be wise at all.